Motives

Look at these precious babies! They are on a list of about 8 sets of kids for whom I want to submit my home study.

If you want to straight up adopt and not take a chance of getting a kid you can't handle or won't blend well with your kids or don't want to take the chance that you could fall in love and they'd be sent home, then you can adopt through the state and it costs almost nothing! As a matter of fact, and I mentioned this before, they state will pay you!

You can go online to the TARE galleries and look at pictures and sometimes small bios on the kids. These are kids that are legally free for adoption. You submit your home study to CPS and they review it and see if you're a good match. If you're selected, you would have the opportunity to read their entire file so you'd know exactly what has been going on with them. If you're still interested, you meet them a few times and then the integration from their current foster home to your home happens. Sometimes that is a very slow process and sometimes not. It just depends on the kid(s).

Anyway, just wanted to share that beautiful photograph and give you a glimpse of some very real faces that need a permanent family.

On another note, Jim and I have been praying that God might reveal any impure motives we have for wanting to do this. There are lots of reasons I want to do this and could probably convince anyone of the most noble on the list. But I know myself. And I know human nature.

I have to admit that I get some enjoyment from people simply knowing that Jim and I are on this path. Is it because they say "Oh, that is such a great thing you're doing"? Or is it to educate people on the process? Or is it simply that I'm excited about it and want to share it with others? Maybe all three. But maybe there is more.

I don't think people, in general, are honest with themselves about their motives. It's not often that anyone explores their motives. Why would you if nobody is asking you to? And if you dug deep to find them, you might become a little too self aware and not like what you find.

In the Bible, David asked God to reveal any evil in his heart. I'm asking the same. You might think EVIL is a harsh word for a selfish motive, but I believe the most evil things in the world are the ones nobody would really call "evil". For instance, putting your kids first. Who, in their right mind, would say that is evil? I would. Putting your kids first is worshiping a false god. And God takes that pretty seriously.

This post is getting WAY to heavy!! Back to motives:

Satan has shouted at me about what a glory-hog I am, but the Holy Spirit is consistently reminding me to ignore him. I'm growing more confident every day that my motives are pure. For those of you who know my story of grace, you might understand why I would want to give back anything I can to help those who might be headed in the same direction in which I was once lost.

Maybe the biggest motive is ADVENTURE! God made us adventure junkies! Christianity is an adventure full of scary obstacles and wonderful joy. The more a heart becomes like God's character, the more it longs for bigger adventure. You know, you start off just walking down the church aisle to God's calling. That is REALLY scary for new Christians. Then you're totally into water sports, meaning baptism, of course. Then you're climbing mountains like sharing your faith with your friends. Maybe you do some deep sea diving and have to be rescued (straying away from God and returning to his Grace) and eventually......... maybe................ you're willing to foster some jacked-up kids.

I'm excited and scared and this adventure won't end when my vacation days are all used up! It keeps going! Might get hurt. Might climb to new heights. But I'm standing on the edge of the cliff, ready to jump and my amazing Husband is beside me, but my GOD is beneath me waiting to catch me if I fall......my bungee cord, if you will.