Adoption Applications and Foster Licensing

Can't believe it has been only 6 months since Jason and Ciara went home! It actually feels like a lifetime ago! Since then, Georgi was born and is now practically walking...okay, not really, but she is a CHUNK of baby meat that cannot keep a smile to herself! And I have learned so much about myself and what I expect and don't expect out of children that may someday live in our house!

We have done respite care (keeping foster kids for more than 48 hours) for several families and have learned that we do not want a baby under 12 months. Walking is a must! And have learned that I really prefer and adore girls. "PINK it up" is our motto in this house! Poor Jim is living in a barbie dream world. Poor Jim, HA! He beamed while putting together a pink kitchen last night and recently suggested painting our bedroom pink. (just checking to see if he is reading this). While I lean toward girls, I would love to see the world through the eyes of a mommy with boys and I'd be so proud for Jim to pour into some male souls all the wisdom, strength and tenderness he has cultivated over the years.

So we don't have any new foster kids right now, but I am keeping a 3 year old and a 1 year old on Mondays and Fridays and their mom keeps my girls on Wednesdays (and pays me for the extra day). It has been wonderful to have a day to myself every week and I have bonded strongly with these sweet girls! I have also figured out how to go places all by myself with 4 kids ages 3 and under! I can't be shy about asking strangers for help, It takes a village, but we do it and we have fun and I haven't left anyone behind yet. I'm much more confident now that I have practiced and I feel totally ready, even eager, for the challenge of at least 4 kids!

In other news, we have submitted our home study for 4 groups of kids, none of whom we are likely to be chosen for. Sigh. Why you ask? Really, you have to ask? We've only been married 3.75 years, we have both been married before, we have two young baby girls requiring a lot of attention and we have a shady past. So, there ya go. On paper, next to the Hutchins family, we ain't gonna shine! BUT, that only means that straight adoption (applying for kids who are legally free to be adopted) probably isn't going to happen for us. We can still adopt through foster care. If we foster kids whose parents end up losing their rights and there are no relatives who qualify to take them, then we'd get the kids....if we wanted them. CPS isn't as picky about foster parents as they are about adopted parents because foster families are rare and they are always anxious to place kids quickly assuming they will go back home. But only 40% of kids in foster care end up back at home permanently. So in order to keep things as continuous as possible for these poor children, it's preferable that the foster family who has had them for a year or more ends up adopting. (and as a reminder to those of you who aren't familiar with the system, parents have about a year to 'win' back their kids by working programs like rehab, parenting classes, therapy, etc. If they fail to do this, rights are terminated. But of course there are lots of opportunities to appeal or for family members to step in and claim them, so the process is long and grueling and heart wrenching for everyone).



In this picture to the left, our kids and 3 others on a 'practice' weekend! I'm excited for this to be our norm!

So, right now we are waiting for a call for either foster or to be notified that we've been selected for one of the groups of kids we submitted our home study for. If, by a small miracle, we are selected for the adoptable kids, we'd be able to read the file on the children and learn all about them. If we don't come across info that scared us away, like a history of aggression toward younger kids or something like that, we'd proceed by meeting the kids, then an overnight visit, then slowly transitioning them out of their current foster home and into ours. (if you're wondering why the current foster parents aren't keeping them, it's because many families feel called to ONLY FOSTER, not adopt. That is super needed and very admirable and usually done by families with older kids who just want to help but don't want to be "lifers".)

The kink in this plan is that Jim and I both have to take a class called BCMT every year to keep our license active and we are due to have it before the end of March. It's offered on Saturdays. Not usually an option for me in the Springtime with wedding season in full bloom. Jim will attend this Saturday and I'm going to sneak into the last half hour of the class (after my wedding party is fully beautified) and hope they put me through. Otherwise, our license will be suspended until I can take the class and the April class date doesn't work for me either! UG! Maybe this is God's plan to keep is 'free' until just the right kids for us come available. I love it when He protects us from ourselves!